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Kelvin
1st September
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Saturday, March 05, 2011
Somehow i know i'm in a very safe position because when something drastic happens, i always fall back unto God. When things don't go the way it should, when something made me feel uneasy and lost, i know i can count on my God. It is a blessing to know a God that can help me tank alot of rubbish and pull me through all awkward situations and no matter what, i will always become stronger in my faith.
Leading a new cg or rather dg now. i feel as though i'm drifting away from church because there's not much people left to fellowship with in church. Maybe there is, but i always expect people to come to me. i am starting to adopt a very self absorbed attitude where everything should be about how people can help me. maybe i am a little tired of always giving in my workplace, just wished that church could be a little more 'charitable' towards me. maybe i am not doing it the right way, doing it out of my own love. God i pray that u'll grant me more of ur love so that i can love others.
s0me of my students think that i show favortism in class just because i allowed one of them to sit behind. i don't suppose i need to explain to them the rationale behind my actions but i definitely ahve a reason for doing so. i guess in some sense, all of us got to have a lil faith. i know im not the best teacher, but i am definitely working towards being a good teacher that my students can look up to, can confide in and can perform their best in school. give me time and i will show u that i am sincere.
in the aspects of my relationship, God is giving me more signs now and its time that i learn to trust him and not worry so much about it. the right one aint here yet. its so close, i thought she was the one but she isn't. how can i be so sure? maybe im not but if she is, she'll somehow be a major part of my life whether i like it or not.
people are so complicated sometimes, i admit im not that simple too but what i want is pretty clear. a small group of close friends that i can share my life with and worship God together. still waiting for two prayers to be answered. someday i know God will answer it. if my two best friends knew how much i want them to be saved.
+++11:48 PM+++
Jesus is Love
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”
14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say “Hi Greg, How’s your day been?”
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.
22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.
+++11:21 AM+++
Jesus is Love
Monday, September 27, 2010
hey so its been awhile since i've last updated and its not as tho im busy or anything, rather, i forgot bout my blog. so yes, from what u last heard from me, i'm still teaching. after 12 weeks, i have officially become one of them. i think i blended in quite well among the students, having taught classes on all the levels due to the overwhelming amount of relief classes that came unto me. well, it wasnt all a bad thing.
when i heard that i was going to take classes that im unfamiliar with, i became a little worried especially when i had to teach. my approach on the notoriously rowdy classes was to have an attitude that is feared. so yea, i went in without a smile, they greeted me, then i handed out work to do. people can ask questions but i want work to be done. people who doesnt get work done will get a scolding from me. after class however, some of the band members came to me and asked why my attitude changed, like i was in a bad mood or something. that got me thinking. that's not the way i wanna teach. i want to be the good teacher that everyone adore. i want to be the best teacher that people will listen and pay attention to. i want to be a fun teacher that inspires. if so, i think im walking the wrong path.
in my defense however, being strict with them do work. classes whom teachers labelled as an aweful bunch were relatively well behaved in my class. they did the work that i handed out etc. but i think this will only be a temporary thing. i think the key point will be strict rather than fierce. u enforce some rules for them to follow. if they do it, all is well. in cases where people dun comply, that's when u discipline them accordingly.
so now i have a bro in school who plays the same instrument as me. i enjoy the attention from him, sms me everyday, walk home with me occasionally etc. if i am an alumni, it is okay but now that im a teacher, im not sure if i can b that close to a student. oh well, in any case, have been staying back quite alot after school to coach some of the weaker students. im quite glad that they bothered to find me.
going to b exposed to all the activities that are organised by the school. october will be pretty exciting, with inter school teachers' games and sec 2 orientation camp. this internship really rocks. haven had so much fun in a long time.
oh yea, this fri gonna have children's day party at adm. finally gonna meet dorothy. daryl said i have no balls and wun dare to do anything. well i guess he's right. however my only concern is even if i do something, what are the odds of getting her? it'll b hard to stay in contact if she's staying in hall right. also, there's the age thing. afterall, 6 years apart can be pretty scary to some of the girls, especially year 1s. not keeping my hopes high for this one but i will try.
+++7:43 PM+++
Jesus is Love
Saturday, July 17, 2010
okie so this is the end of week 3 already. i've decided to add my students on facebook since i guess this is the best way to break the barriers between us. had some interesting convos with some of the teachers there and i felt that it was a little extreme. however, i am glad that there are like minded teachers still around. in life i realised that u always have to look at the brighter side of things and everything will be fine. friction bound to occur when u are cooped up with the same few people everyday. u'll realise their flaws and perhaps they will also find something that will irritate them from you.
as i was bitching to shermin about some of our colleagues, the next day God convicted me to be more forgiving for Him. if someone slap u on one cheek, u dun slap him back but rather offer the other side as well. it sounds ridiculous i know, as christians we are called to go the extra mile for people, by human capacity of cuz we'll fail but we have God, i have God.
after mingling with my students during class as well as in cca, i discovered alot of discrimination and weird patterns. kids these days first of all enjoy pain. they came to me and challenged me to the "hand squeezing" game. i kind of thrashed all of them but yet at the same time they keep coming to me and asking me to "cause them pain".
ytd i witnessed my first fight in school just before my first training in judo. at first it was just teasing, then it went on to pushing and finally fighting. its a good thing that the fight ceased after i pull them apart. guy A, lets call him Alan and guy B, Ben. Alan is quite zai in judo while Ben just started off and fundamentally weak in his moves evnthough he's much bigger in size. so anyway, it started off when i just came out of the staff room and a bunch of students came to me and asked if i was joining them for training. none of them knew i was a teacher there and they asked me if i was new cuz they never see me before.
student: u here for judo ah?
me: ya
student: training is on the 4th floor today. which school u from?
me: huh? this school la.
student: hmm how old are u?
me: wad do u think?
student: 17. u just graduated is it?
me: ehh im a teacher in this school le *laughing inside*
student: huh u're a teacher? u sure anot. never see u b4.
LOL hilarious convo. so im 17 again. i should wear gee more often. hahah
so during the training, alot of pple came to teach me stuff which was good. however, i realised that Alan was abit unhappy. i think he felt abit threatened by my presense cuz i suppose i bruised his ego. as a first timer, everyone expected me to be dang noob. during their warmups, we had to run 3 rounds the school plus up and down the stairs. then, we had to do front row, back row and cart wheel. of cuz i did everything perfectly since i did cheer for 3 years. Alan sparred with me but didn't managed to throw me, i mean what did he expect? im not some feather weight teacher with no muscles. i think secondary school students haven been exposed to the wonders of gym so they havent seen people who are in another league. oh well, this paragraph has no intention for self glorification. what im trying to say was that i realised he's super competitive and i think i will have trouble connecting with him in days to come.
with regards to discrimination in school, Ben suffers that fate. everyone told me that's he's lousy, useless etc. in fact, that kind of drew me to him. i felt that as a teacher i'm not there to join them but to impart them values. so even when everyone told me not to learn from him, i kept on going to him and sparred with him. i want to teach them to be gracious with their words and be more encouraging to one another. right now i see judo as a scary place cuz there are so many wolves around trying to eliminate the weak. i guess that's the difference between band and judo. most pple from band are very good natured. play around, laugh and do stupid things. as much as i want to be part of band, i guess there's more work to be done at judo. then again, im giving myself only 2 weeks cuz its tiring. the last thing i want is to burn myself up.
k time for lunch. ciao
+++11:21 AM+++
Jesus is Love
Thursday, July 01, 2010
day 1
i felt a little nostalgic going back to an environment that i was once familiar with. Seeing all the old teachers back in school, observing them and learning from them was abit weird. As in i suppose that the whole concept of the internship was quite screwed up and not properly thought up i suppose. in a way, i just wanted to teach and i didn't really think about how i am going to churn out a 50 pages report by the end of the semester. anyway, first day of school and i had already been hit by the inevitable "sai kang" arrow from the upper echelon. first up, it was giving art classes to a bunch of normal acad kids. i was told that these kids were quite mischevious and hard to handle. in any case that they misbehave or made too much noise, i was asked to hit the table with the metal rule.
well, i did use the instructed method cuz the noise level was kind of excessive. gradually, as i walk around and teach them to complete their assignment, the decibel level decreased. as i went through the worksheet, level went up again but i guess they have every reason to do so since i made them shout out the answers. was hoping to do it in a little more orderly but yea, i still a greenhorn.
glad that i went thru the lesson with a little more experience and then, i had my first meal in school.
2nd day
nothing much happened, i went in to the science classes taught by Mrs Hsu and observe. in my point of view, i thought and still think that she's a great teacher. the way she go through the concepts with ease made me a little nervous tho. not sure if im up to it yet. then, i went to observe xinyi as well. she's like this new teacher too but had abit more experience than me. her style of teaching was very diff from mine but albeit effective. however, the feminine approach cannot be imitated or copied by a masculine figure such as myself.
3rd day
had my second relief teaching duty. this time round, it was music (with the same class). the class size was smaller since the "odd numbers" went for computing and the "even ones" came to me. everyone was late cuz they couldn't find the place. this was my first attempt taking a class alone and i loved it. could do what i want with the class, be more of myself. managed to know the names of my students and talked to them the way i would want to talk to them. i finally caught a glimpse of what my dream job's gonna be like.
then, it was Mrs Hsu's class again. this time round it was sec 3e1. i sat right at the back and two guys around me came and asked me bout my own classroom experience, whether i could stay awake in class that kinda thing. i was rather straight forward and told them the truth which i regretted after i said it. i had to make a choice of whether i want to be a teacher that they can relate with or i can be a teacher who does the right thing. based on that, i chose to be the cool me. hah
basically at the end of the class, Mrs Hsu announced the names of those who had to go through remedial classes with me since they are weaker than the rest. the few guys whom i've interacted with volunteered to go for my remedial classes. they were denied access to my teachings but deep down, i felt happy that they wanted to go for my remedials. i felt as tho i might actually have the drawing factor and that God really wanted me to do this.
during recess, as i strolled down to the canteen with my fellow interns, there was this strong vomit smell along the corridor. as before we reached the outskirts of canteen, a bunch of students shouted at us and warned us about the dried up puddle of vomit just before us. usual response for students at other sch will be minding their own business and laugh when we step on it. guess what, my students are different in a good way.
4th day
my 3rd relief teaching experience with a technical class, sec 1. once again, rumors has it that they cannot sit properly, be thankful if they will just remain in their seat. after going through the lesson, i am totally convinced not to listen to all those bullshit about students in this school. the kids at the front try to perform magic to entertain me, listened to my instructions and behaved. kids at the side did their own things and kept really quiet after i scolded them. those in the middle were just stoning there which was a good thing too.
after that class, i was free all the way till 330 for band practise. and yes, i joined band again. it was like after i blew into the mouth piece and found out that i remembered how to play my instrument, i was addicted to it. of course i wouldn't admit it when confronted, in fact i was even invited to play in the concert next week. maybe the book that i read in sec 3 about my fate as a tubist was right all along. hah
and so, i gave up meeting bff and dar for band. can u believe it? guess what, at this present moment after i got home from work, i checked facebook and saw one of my students trying to add me. though i didn't accept it, once again im pleased. he's a tubist too, quite a nice kid. anyway, my point is this, i actually look forward to go to work tmr. weird eh, addicted to teaching.
+++9:32 PM+++
Jesus is Love
Saturday, June 05, 2010
the need to feel loved, the need to feel wanted, the need to feel noticed. i guess i've gone past that stage. right now i am perfectly comfortable with where i stood and honestly, i have all that i need. it is also true that one will never have enough of what they already have, we want more! the desire to constantly getting more and more will dry up the well eventually. contentment then, is the key to stay happy.
who do not wish to find someone to complete themselves? who do not wish to have someone to hold? in any case, that person is not me. still trying to find a girl to love and its not going to be easy because in the first place im not that easy to live with. faith then, to believe that God has a plan for me definitely make things easier. i do not have to think about it, i do not have to worry. He said in the bible, ask and u shall receive. it might not be wad i thought it would be like, but i know that it will be better! afterall, God's ways are higher than my ways.
so results out. i did pretty well this sem. honestly speaking, i couldn't have done it without God's help. in any sense when i took the papers, i felt that i was a goner. who would have expected it to be my best sem thus far. in addition to that, i got accepted by MOE. so there, my path is set up nicely for me. THANK U GOD!!
after i got back from HK, i felt as though i dun even know my cell group that well. staying with Julius for 5 days made me realised that there are so many things that i do not know about them and i felt really guity cuz afterall, i have been hanging out with them since years back. ideally, i would want to chill with them more before school starts, perhaps ask them for drinks or something along that line. it seems abit weird tho, i dunno how to say this but i guess there's abit of generation gap or so i thought. i always feel that i can clique better with people younger than me. i still believe thats true. however, something's changed. my role as a cgl becomes a little shady, as a leader and as a friend. as i reveal to them the "me", i dunno if they can differentiate what to follow and what not to follow. of course i wanna be a role model for them. the last thing i wanna do is to lead them to the mistakes that i've made and make them think that its okie since i done it before too. in terms of that, i need wisdom.
slacking at home made me realised how much my mum misses me over these 5 years. after i moved back home, she started taking mc and we spent so much time nuaing at the couch and watching tv, talking nonsense together. mum told me what my dad do when im not around, like after mopping the floor, my dad will slide from one end to the other. my family rocks!!
+++12:55 AM+++
Jesus is Love
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
ah. i am waiting for 3am to come so i can depart from home to go airport to send my 10 years pact soon to be girlfriend to USA for 6months. HAHAHAHA. so scandelous. who will remember such stuff from secondary school laa.
and yes, i am getting quite excited to get back to school, partly because im getting quite bored and lost after spending so much time mugging for exams and for once, i feel empty. weird kind of empty. the background music doesn't help at all: total eclipse of my heart - westlife. emo but nice.
oh haha, here's a super random comment. i think have the gift of celibacy. as i observe certain guys on the street as well as my friends, i realised that those attached and those not attached got a certain trend. can't really tell specifically wad is it yet but i am kind of contented being single for now. BUT, i dun mind people matchmaking me with strangers as long as she is pretty and is a christian. *hint hint at gym* lol. i should really work in some church organisation or go for school of theology or something to expand my christian network. so i guess this gift just enables me to feel comfortable with my singlehood. then again, it might just be another lame excuse, who cares.
bff was complaining to me about work politics and she felt abit lost. then i realised that actually being a christian is dang shiok. everytime we feel lost, there's always someone who knows everything and can give us the best answer. someone who has control over my future and make sure that i am in good hands. this is the God i love and adore so much! so politics at my new school, come what may, i am a conqueror for my God will go before me. can't wait to serve God in school. pray pray pray!!
and yes finally, my holiday plan!
1)driving
2)meet james and bry more
3)save money for year end trip with james and cheryl
4) get at least 4 tutees
5) go library to read and relax
6) go running twice a week
7) gym twice a week
8) pack and refurnish my room
+++12:59 AM+++
Jesus is Love
Somehow i know i'm in a very safe position because when something drastic happens, i always fall back unto God. When things don't go the way it should, when something made me feel uneasy and lost, i know i can count on my God. It is a blessing to know a God that can help me tank alot of rubbish and pull me through all awkward situations and no matter what, i will always become stronger in my faith.
Leading a new cg or rather dg now. i feel as though i'm drifting away from church because there's not much people left to fellowship with in church. Maybe there is, but i always expect people to come to me. i am starting to adopt a very self absorbed attitude where everything should be about how people can help me. maybe i am a little tired of always giving in my workplace, just wished that church could be a little more 'charitable' towards me. maybe i am not doing it the right way, doing it out of my own love. God i pray that u'll grant me more of ur love so that i can love others.
s0me of my students think that i show favortism in class just because i allowed one of them to sit behind. i don't suppose i need to explain to them the rationale behind my actions but i definitely ahve a reason for doing so. i guess in some sense, all of us got to have a lil faith. i know im not the best teacher, but i am definitely working towards being a good teacher that my students can look up to, can confide in and can perform their best in school. give me time and i will show u that i am sincere.
in the aspects of my relationship, God is giving me more signs now and its time that i learn to trust him and not worry so much about it. the right one aint here yet. its so close, i thought she was the one but she isn't. how can i be so sure? maybe im not but if she is, she'll somehow be a major part of my life whether i like it or not.
people are so complicated sometimes, i admit im not that simple too but what i want is pretty clear. a small group of close friends that i can share my life with and worship God together. still waiting for two prayers to be answered. someday i know God will answer it. if my two best friends knew how much i want them to be saved.
Jesus is Love
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”
14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say “Hi Greg, How’s your day been?”
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.
22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.
Jesus is Love
Monday, September 27, 2010
hey so its been awhile since i've last updated and its not as tho im busy or anything, rather, i forgot bout my blog. so yes, from what u last heard from me, i'm still teaching. after 12 weeks, i have officially become one of them. i think i blended in quite well among the students, having taught classes on all the levels due to the overwhelming amount of relief classes that came unto me. well, it wasnt all a bad thing.
when i heard that i was going to take classes that im unfamiliar with, i became a little worried especially when i had to teach. my approach on the notoriously rowdy classes was to have an attitude that is feared. so yea, i went in without a smile, they greeted me, then i handed out work to do. people can ask questions but i want work to be done. people who doesnt get work done will get a scolding from me. after class however, some of the band members came to me and asked why my attitude changed, like i was in a bad mood or something. that got me thinking. that's not the way i wanna teach. i want to be the good teacher that everyone adore. i want to be the best teacher that people will listen and pay attention to. i want to be a fun teacher that inspires. if so, i think im walking the wrong path.
in my defense however, being strict with them do work. classes whom teachers labelled as an aweful bunch were relatively well behaved in my class. they did the work that i handed out etc. but i think this will only be a temporary thing. i think the key point will be strict rather than fierce. u enforce some rules for them to follow. if they do it, all is well. in cases where people dun comply, that's when u discipline them accordingly.
so now i have a bro in school who plays the same instrument as me. i enjoy the attention from him, sms me everyday, walk home with me occasionally etc. if i am an alumni, it is okay but now that im a teacher, im not sure if i can b that close to a student. oh well, in any case, have been staying back quite alot after school to coach some of the weaker students. im quite glad that they bothered to find me.
going to b exposed to all the activities that are organised by the school. october will be pretty exciting, with inter school teachers' games and sec 2 orientation camp. this internship really rocks. haven had so much fun in a long time.
oh yea, this fri gonna have children's day party at adm. finally gonna meet dorothy. daryl said i have no balls and wun dare to do anything. well i guess he's right. however my only concern is even if i do something, what are the odds of getting her? it'll b hard to stay in contact if she's staying in hall right. also, there's the age thing. afterall, 6 years apart can be pretty scary to some of the girls, especially year 1s. not keeping my hopes high for this one but i will try.
Jesus is Love
Saturday, July 17, 2010
okie so this is the end of week 3 already. i've decided to add my students on facebook since i guess this is the best way to break the barriers between us. had some interesting convos with some of the teachers there and i felt that it was a little extreme. however, i am glad that there are like minded teachers still around. in life i realised that u always have to look at the brighter side of things and everything will be fine. friction bound to occur when u are cooped up with the same few people everyday. u'll realise their flaws and perhaps they will also find something that will irritate them from you.
as i was bitching to shermin about some of our colleagues, the next day God convicted me to be more forgiving for Him. if someone slap u on one cheek, u dun slap him back but rather offer the other side as well. it sounds ridiculous i know, as christians we are called to go the extra mile for people, by human capacity of cuz we'll fail but we have God, i have God.
after mingling with my students during class as well as in cca, i discovered alot of discrimination and weird patterns. kids these days first of all enjoy pain. they came to me and challenged me to the "hand squeezing" game. i kind of thrashed all of them but yet at the same time they keep coming to me and asking me to "cause them pain".
ytd i witnessed my first fight in school just before my first training in judo. at first it was just teasing, then it went on to pushing and finally fighting. its a good thing that the fight ceased after i pull them apart. guy A, lets call him Alan and guy B, Ben. Alan is quite zai in judo while Ben just started off and fundamentally weak in his moves evnthough he's much bigger in size. so anyway, it started off when i just came out of the staff room and a bunch of students came to me and asked if i was joining them for training. none of them knew i was a teacher there and they asked me if i was new cuz they never see me before.
student: u here for judo ah?
me: ya
student: training is on the 4th floor today. which school u from?
me: huh? this school la.
student: hmm how old are u?
me: wad do u think?
student: 17. u just graduated is it?
me: ehh im a teacher in this school le *laughing inside*
student: huh u're a teacher? u sure anot. never see u b4.
LOL hilarious convo. so im 17 again. i should wear gee more often. hahah
so during the training, alot of pple came to teach me stuff which was good. however, i realised that Alan was abit unhappy. i think he felt abit threatened by my presense cuz i suppose i bruised his ego. as a first timer, everyone expected me to be dang noob. during their warmups, we had to run 3 rounds the school plus up and down the stairs. then, we had to do front row, back row and cart wheel. of cuz i did everything perfectly since i did cheer for 3 years. Alan sparred with me but didn't managed to throw me, i mean what did he expect? im not some feather weight teacher with no muscles. i think secondary school students haven been exposed to the wonders of gym so they havent seen people who are in another league. oh well, this paragraph has no intention for self glorification. what im trying to say was that i realised he's super competitive and i think i will have trouble connecting with him in days to come.
with regards to discrimination in school, Ben suffers that fate. everyone told me that's he's lousy, useless etc. in fact, that kind of drew me to him. i felt that as a teacher i'm not there to join them but to impart them values. so even when everyone told me not to learn from him, i kept on going to him and sparred with him. i want to teach them to be gracious with their words and be more encouraging to one another. right now i see judo as a scary place cuz there are so many wolves around trying to eliminate the weak. i guess that's the difference between band and judo. most pple from band are very good natured. play around, laugh and do stupid things. as much as i want to be part of band, i guess there's more work to be done at judo. then again, im giving myself only 2 weeks cuz its tiring. the last thing i want is to burn myself up.
k time for lunch. ciao
Jesus is Love
Thursday, July 01, 2010
day 1
i felt a little nostalgic going back to an environment that i was once familiar with. Seeing all the old teachers back in school, observing them and learning from them was abit weird. As in i suppose that the whole concept of the internship was quite screwed up and not properly thought up i suppose. in a way, i just wanted to teach and i didn't really think about how i am going to churn out a 50 pages report by the end of the semester. anyway, first day of school and i had already been hit by the inevitable "sai kang" arrow from the upper echelon. first up, it was giving art classes to a bunch of normal acad kids. i was told that these kids were quite mischevious and hard to handle. in any case that they misbehave or made too much noise, i was asked to hit the table with the metal rule.
well, i did use the instructed method cuz the noise level was kind of excessive. gradually, as i walk around and teach them to complete their assignment, the decibel level decreased. as i went through the worksheet, level went up again but i guess they have every reason to do so since i made them shout out the answers. was hoping to do it in a little more orderly but yea, i still a greenhorn.
glad that i went thru the lesson with a little more experience and then, i had my first meal in school.
2nd day
nothing much happened, i went in to the science classes taught by Mrs Hsu and observe. in my point of view, i thought and still think that she's a great teacher. the way she go through the concepts with ease made me a little nervous tho. not sure if im up to it yet. then, i went to observe xinyi as well. she's like this new teacher too but had abit more experience than me. her style of teaching was very diff from mine but albeit effective. however, the feminine approach cannot be imitated or copied by a masculine figure such as myself.
3rd day
had my second relief teaching duty. this time round, it was music (with the same class). the class size was smaller since the "odd numbers" went for computing and the "even ones" came to me. everyone was late cuz they couldn't find the place. this was my first attempt taking a class alone and i loved it. could do what i want with the class, be more of myself. managed to know the names of my students and talked to them the way i would want to talk to them. i finally caught a glimpse of what my dream job's gonna be like.
then, it was Mrs Hsu's class again. this time round it was sec 3e1. i sat right at the back and two guys around me came and asked me bout my own classroom experience, whether i could stay awake in class that kinda thing. i was rather straight forward and told them the truth which i regretted after i said it. i had to make a choice of whether i want to be a teacher that they can relate with or i can be a teacher who does the right thing. based on that, i chose to be the cool me. hah
basically at the end of the class, Mrs Hsu announced the names of those who had to go through remedial classes with me since they are weaker than the rest. the few guys whom i've interacted with volunteered to go for my remedial classes. they were denied access to my teachings but deep down, i felt happy that they wanted to go for my remedials. i felt as tho i might actually have the drawing factor and that God really wanted me to do this.
during recess, as i strolled down to the canteen with my fellow interns, there was this strong vomit smell along the corridor. as before we reached the outskirts of canteen, a bunch of students shouted at us and warned us about the dried up puddle of vomit just before us. usual response for students at other sch will be minding their own business and laugh when we step on it. guess what, my students are different in a good way.
4th day
my 3rd relief teaching experience with a technical class, sec 1. once again, rumors has it that they cannot sit properly, be thankful if they will just remain in their seat. after going through the lesson, i am totally convinced not to listen to all those bullshit about students in this school. the kids at the front try to perform magic to entertain me, listened to my instructions and behaved. kids at the side did their own things and kept really quiet after i scolded them. those in the middle were just stoning there which was a good thing too.
after that class, i was free all the way till 330 for band practise. and yes, i joined band again. it was like after i blew into the mouth piece and found out that i remembered how to play my instrument, i was addicted to it. of course i wouldn't admit it when confronted, in fact i was even invited to play in the concert next week. maybe the book that i read in sec 3 about my fate as a tubist was right all along. hah
and so, i gave up meeting bff and dar for band. can u believe it? guess what, at this present moment after i got home from work, i checked facebook and saw one of my students trying to add me. though i didn't accept it, once again im pleased. he's a tubist too, quite a nice kid. anyway, my point is this, i actually look forward to go to work tmr. weird eh, addicted to teaching.
Jesus is Love
Saturday, June 05, 2010
the need to feel loved, the need to feel wanted, the need to feel noticed. i guess i've gone past that stage. right now i am perfectly comfortable with where i stood and honestly, i have all that i need. it is also true that one will never have enough of what they already have, we want more! the desire to constantly getting more and more will dry up the well eventually. contentment then, is the key to stay happy.
who do not wish to find someone to complete themselves? who do not wish to have someone to hold? in any case, that person is not me. still trying to find a girl to love and its not going to be easy because in the first place im not that easy to live with. faith then, to believe that God has a plan for me definitely make things easier. i do not have to think about it, i do not have to worry. He said in the bible, ask and u shall receive. it might not be wad i thought it would be like, but i know that it will be better! afterall, God's ways are higher than my ways.
so results out. i did pretty well this sem. honestly speaking, i couldn't have done it without God's help. in any sense when i took the papers, i felt that i was a goner. who would have expected it to be my best sem thus far. in addition to that, i got accepted by MOE. so there, my path is set up nicely for me. THANK U GOD!!
after i got back from HK, i felt as though i dun even know my cell group that well. staying with Julius for 5 days made me realised that there are so many things that i do not know about them and i felt really guity cuz afterall, i have been hanging out with them since years back. ideally, i would want to chill with them more before school starts, perhaps ask them for drinks or something along that line. it seems abit weird tho, i dunno how to say this but i guess there's abit of generation gap or so i thought. i always feel that i can clique better with people younger than me. i still believe thats true. however, something's changed. my role as a cgl becomes a little shady, as a leader and as a friend. as i reveal to them the "me", i dunno if they can differentiate what to follow and what not to follow. of course i wanna be a role model for them. the last thing i wanna do is to lead them to the mistakes that i've made and make them think that its okie since i done it before too. in terms of that, i need wisdom.
slacking at home made me realised how much my mum misses me over these 5 years. after i moved back home, she started taking mc and we spent so much time nuaing at the couch and watching tv, talking nonsense together. mum told me what my dad do when im not around, like after mopping the floor, my dad will slide from one end to the other. my family rocks!!
Jesus is Love
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
ah. i am waiting for 3am to come so i can depart from home to go airport to send my 10 years pact soon to be girlfriend to USA for 6months. HAHAHAHA. so scandelous. who will remember such stuff from secondary school laa.
and yes, i am getting quite excited to get back to school, partly because im getting quite bored and lost after spending so much time mugging for exams and for once, i feel empty. weird kind of empty. the background music doesn't help at all: total eclipse of my heart - westlife. emo but nice.
oh haha, here's a super random comment. i think have the gift of celibacy. as i observe certain guys on the street as well as my friends, i realised that those attached and those not attached got a certain trend. can't really tell specifically wad is it yet but i am kind of contented being single for now. BUT, i dun mind people matchmaking me with strangers as long as she is pretty and is a christian. *hint hint at gym* lol. i should really work in some church organisation or go for school of theology or something to expand my christian network. so i guess this gift just enables me to feel comfortable with my singlehood. then again, it might just be another lame excuse, who cares.
bff was complaining to me about work politics and she felt abit lost. then i realised that actually being a christian is dang shiok. everytime we feel lost, there's always someone who knows everything and can give us the best answer. someone who has control over my future and make sure that i am in good hands. this is the God i love and adore so much! so politics at my new school, come what may, i am a conqueror for my God will go before me. can't wait to serve God in school. pray pray pray!!
and yes finally, my holiday plan!
1)driving
2)meet james and bry more
3)save money for year end trip with james and cheryl
4) get at least 4 tutees
5) go library to read and relax
6) go running twice a week
7) gym twice a week
8) pack and refurnish my room
Jesus is Love